If you would have peeked in on my life 6 months ago you would’ve seen me and my holy little self waking up at 5AM every morning (one hour before my children) to have prayer time and you would’ve seen me reading my bible each night, praying with my husband daily and writing in my prayer journal. But, today? Not so much. I am always spiritually blocked during pregnancy. It has happened each time. Luckily, by round 4, I have the benefit of being able to recognize the pattern. I am trying to remember that how I’m feeling now is temporary and it’s a really small sacrifice all things considered.
A friend let me borrow a book “Holiness for Housewives (And Other Working Women)” and it really kick started my soul in a very St. Therese type of way. St. Therese was the queen of “small acts with big love”. She didn’t bite off more than she could chew and she didn’t bring God down to her level. She knew how big He was and she knew He would take whatever she was able to give.
And, so, in an effort to channel my inner St. Therese, I sat down and thought about what I could realistically offer the Lord in this season of life. I jotted down my “small acts” and I share them below (I hope they help you channel your inner St. Therese’).
“Dear Diana: stop fighting where you are! Life is not about all or nothing. Embrace the tiny, little steps you make towards God. Decorate your home so that your surroundings remind you of Christ. Say small, itty bitty prayers. Listen to Christian radio in the car. Read good, uplighting, positive books. Keep meeting your accountability partners (even if sometimes you walk away feeling like you should be doing more–squash that feeling and be enough). Look for God in everyday: a funny kid, a mid-day nap. Get outside at least a little bit each day, the sun can work magic for the soul. Seek ways to help others. Take care of yourself. Go to confession. Begin again.”
God loves YOU. Not the you that you will one day become. Not the you that you should be. The actual you. The person who is grouchy in the morning and forgot to send your kid book fair money. The mom who doesn’t always want to read that book for the 7th time. You. Let Him.